Adultism

I was a dancer for my whole childhood life. Actually, dancing WAS my whole life. This sport took control over my time, my body, and my mind. I loved it when I was younger, but as I reached about age 16 my feelings changed. I wanted to hang out with my friends or just relax for once after school. My schedule was filling up with driver’s training classes, high school gymnastics team, my part time job, friends, boyfriends, and anything else besides dance, really.

I would get punished at dance if I missed a class or was even more than 15 minutes late. My instructors were not understanding of school activities or work. I remember being so angry that I grew to hate the one thing I always loved so much. It was complete bullshit. This strict schedule made me beyond miserable. I remember crying to my mom, expressing how much I did not want to be there. She always had the same response…… “Winners don’t quit and quitters don’t win”…….. I still cringe when I hear that saying. My mom was always super supportive of my wishes and decisions, EXCEPT my wanting to quit dancing. AAANNOYINNGGGG.

As time went on, I would act out in petty ways, like wearing a bra strap on stage or “accidentally” forgetting to take the hair tie off my wrist. I eventually started walking out of classes and getting in my car and leaving. I fought with my instructor more than once a month. It just wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t I just miss a half hour of class so that I could go to work? I still don’t get it. When I told my instructors that I made captain of my school’s gymnastics team, all that they were concerned with was making sure my meets didn’t interfere with their wonderful dance classes or practices. They weren’t even happy for me or proud of me. Selfish asses.


And just for the record, when my instructor’s daughter got to be in high school, her group was allowed to participate in other sports and go to work and miss classes. Sounds fair, right?

Comments

  1. Victoria RestlerSeptember 27, 2018 at 1:03 PM

    Thanks for sharing this post Ryanna. This sounds extremely frustrating and also hurtful. It seems like these adults held up and valued one part of you/ your skills and abilities, but ignored/ denied the broader picture of who you were as well as your own stated wishes. Looking back now, how do you wish they had responded? How might you respond as a youth worker to a young person in a similar position?

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